In the quiet hush of the labor & delivery room, where the air is charged with anticipation and the scent of earthiness and birthyness, a new chapter in your life unfolds. The rhythmic cadence of your breath is mirrored by the gentle whispers of your doula, a reassuring presence in this oh so sacred moment. The culmination of nine months… maybe more, leads to this: the first hour with your newborn.
When I was selecting items for my baby registry, it was really important to me to not go overboard. As a doula of 14 years, I’ve seen families get overwhelmed with the amount of stuff in their homes and nurseries and I knew I wanted to keep things on the simpler side. I also wanted to be mindful of the impact on not only the environment, but also my baby’s microbiome - which meant finding a lot of eco-friendly products to keep waste down and keep our home as “low tox” as possible. Here you’ll find some of my favorite sustainable and most useful items that I registered for.
The Doulas of Orange County office phone rings.
I pick up. “Hello! Doulas of Orange County. Lauren speaking.”
A strained voice sounds relieved to hear me, and it sounds like she has been crying. She’s an exhausted new mom of 12-week old twins and a 20-month-old toddler (who won’t let her out of his sight). She’s drained from her twin pregnancy, a difficult birth, and breastfeeding challenges. She struggles to keep up with laundry and wash enough dishes to have plates for the next meal. Her partner has been trying to feed the baby at night, but she’s still waking up to pump for multiples and can’t help but feel guilty about how tired her partner will be at work the next day. She really needs a postpartum doula in Irvine, CA.
“Can you help me, even though my babies are so old?” She asks.
In the quiet hush of the labor & delivery room, where the air is charged with anticipation and the scent of earthiness and birthyness, a new chapter in your life unfolds. The rhythmic cadence of your breath is mirrored by the gentle whispers of your doula, a reassuring presence in this oh so sacred moment. The culmination of nine months… maybe more, leads to this: the first hour with your newborn.
As a dad, oftentimes the reality of having a baby doesn't set in until they're born. Even then, bonding can take a while and this new role of fatherhood can feel oh, so intimidating. We get it and it's completely normal. You didn't carry, birth or nurse your baby and it all feels abstract.
One of my favorite parts of being a Postpartum Doula is to help dads grow closer to their babies and watch their confidence soar.
Pick your favorite books, hold your baby in your lap and read, read, read. Not only does reading to your baby help encourage early language development, but she will love listening to the unique tone and natural rhythm of your voice. If you have a hard time with basic board books, try pulling out your favorite PG chapter book to read aloud. Baby doesn’t care too much about the content, they care about connection.
Bath time is a perfect way to introduce a simple routine that can be just for you and baby. Whether it’s every night before bed or every other day, you will gain confidence as you care for your little one and ensure a special time carved out to enjoy being a dad.
Physical touch is so very important for brain development and emotional security. By introducing a basic massage routine to your week, the bonding hormone, oxytocin will be flowing in both baby and dad. The release of this hormone creates a strong attachment and actually increases your desire to be present and close with those you love.
Diaper changes. It’s a mundane occurrence that happens way too often, right? A baby needs 8-12+ diaper changes a day, which leaves SO many opportunities to connect with your baby while they’re usually awake. I like to encourage fathers to utilize this time making eye contact with their baby and sing a song. Before you know it, it will be the favorite part of your day.
Play is the foundation for early childhood. Get down on the floor and play with your baby. Make silly faces, shake a rattle, tickle their toes and imitate their sounds. You have many more years of play ahead of you, so start now by building a strong attachment rooted in joy.
We promise this idea wasn’t just started by new moms waiting for their 6 week clearance. Multiple studies show that holding your baby skin-to-skin while feeding them, increases bonding, regulates baby’s temperature and encourages baby to be accustomed to your scent. Simply get your little one in a diaper only, cradle them upright in the nook of your arm, make eye contact and feed your baby.
There’s nothing like watching a new dad beam with pride as he calms his crying baby. From the football hold to bouncing on the yoga ball, to swaddling and shhhhhhhhing; a postpartum doula will help you practice each and every soothing technique for your fussy newborn!
The desire to be held spans across every age and starts from the moment you’re born. Babies are often go from rocker, to swing, to crib to tummy time and crave to touch from those they love. You don’t need to hold your baby all day long to create a strong bond. Plop your baby in your arms while catching up on the morning paper or snuggle during the basketball game. As a postpartum doula, I teach all dads how to use a baby-carrier to be able to get some baby snuggles in while still having both hands free!
Our “In the Spotlight” series returns to the scene in 2019 with one of our favorite humans on the planet: Dr. Jane Macris of Blooming Chiropractic. We met Jane back in 2015 when we had office space for rent in our Costa Mesa office. Her energy, smile, and warmth are infectious and we love her heart for serving families. Dr. Jane graduated from Life West Chiropractic College West, where she learned a range of techniques (from gentle, low force to instrument assisted) to address the pregnant and pediatric spine. She is currently pursuing her diploma from the International Chiropractic Pediatric Association and is Webster Certified to better serve her clients. Jane now has her own beautiful office (just across the street from our old one!) and her business is indeed blooming. We had the chance to catch up with Dr. Jane to learn more about how things are going and reconnect after many months had passed and we’re excited to share more about her with you all!
In a world that is constantly on the go, bonding with other humans is often the last thing our minds. True, intimate connections have been replaced by social media and surface level relationships It somehow seems easier and safer that way.
But, is safe and easy best? Should we avoid connection and bonding because it's inconvenient? Not at all. Humanity needs true connection now more than ever. Adults and children alike are designed to need healthy attachment - it's a part of our DNA. It begins with pregnancy and continues to birth, childhood, marriage and beyond. Simply put, bonding is essential for our survival.
Woohoooo! You've made it to the third trimester and the reality that your baby is arriving soon has probably hit you like a ton of bricks! If you're like most of our clients, you want to be as prepared as possible for your birth and this means getting your hospital bag packed and organized by 36 or 37 weeks. If you're feeling a bit overwhelmed by this task - we’ve created an easy, but comprehensive list to make it easier on you. Having your bag packed and ready to go will help you feel more at ease as you enter these last few weeks of pregnancy and prepare to meet your sweet baby!
These are the things you shouldn't skip! Even if this is the bare minimum that you pack - don't forget these items!
Prescription Medications
Toiletry Items: Face wash, moisturizer, tooth brush, shampoo, conditioner, body wash, contact solution, etc. (They do not have most of these items at the hospital so definitely bring your own!)
Glasses (if you're a contact-lense wearer)
Slippers (we recommend throwing them away after)
Comfortable clothing: if you're not interested in wearing a hospital gown for birth or postpartum then make sure you have clothing that allows for easy access to your belly and your nether-regions.
Chapstick or lip moisturizer
Hair ties
Outfit to wear home: non-restrictive clothing is best!
1 or 2 extra pillows (covered in old or dark pillow cases that can be tossed afterwards)
Cell phone/Tablet chargers
Nursing tanks & bras
Ear plugs & eye mask (helpful for those that need a little extra help to fall asleep!)
Several copies of your birth/baby care plan
Photo ID and insurance card
Snacks for you and your partner! (grab our free printable for packing labor snacks here!)
These are great options to have for comfort in labor.
Blue Tooth speaker
Pre-prepped play lists (we recommend creating several - some with upbeat songs to energize you, others with relaxing sounds and no lyrics to help you focus)
Fitness Ball (some hospitals have these, but they may not always be available or be the right size. When in doubt, it's helpful to bring your own).
Essential Oils for labor
Rebozo or a long scarf
Christmas lights (read more about why here)
We haven't forgotten about your awesome partner! The following is helpful to have on hand to make their experience enjoyable!
Snacks!! (we take eating seriously, don't forget food!)
Hydrating beverages
Personal toiletries
Comfy clothing
Breath mints or gum
Comfy shoes
Text/Call/Email list to announce the birth
Extra layers (hospitals get cold then hot then cold again - dress in layers!)
Phone/Tablet charger
Treats for the nurses (protein bars, cookies, chocolate, etc. are all big hits!)
Your little one doesn't need much and the hospital has most of it especially diapers, wipes and swaddles! Many of these items are optional.
Cloth diapers/wipes (if you're choosing to use cloth, you'll need approximately 10-12 diapers per day to be safe). Don't forget your wet bag for storage!
Soft swaddles
Going home outfit
Socks
Onesies (2)
Infant car seat
We hope this list is helpful as you get ready for your baby's birth day! Is there a "must-have" that we missed? We'd love to hear from you! Share your ideas in the comments!
